What is it about the big day that gets the men (and sometimes the women) all wobbly-kneed? We’ve all seen it (or even experienced it); that sinking feeling of doom evidently felt by the bride or groom as the wedding day approaches.

Wedding day jitters are surprisingly common in our society no thanks to the horror stories that goes through the minds of the prospective couple. I personally know of a client that called off their wedding just 2 weeks before the big day. Despite thinking that (at first) they could work through their personal issues, in the end, it was simply too hard, especially when their families got in the way as well. As such, they decided not to jump into the deep end, as they were unsure if the other was the right one.

Some other friends and peers think that their entire lives will come to an end, once they sign that document and exchange their vows. Many of these individuals suddenly see flashes of their future; extra baggage, responsibilities, life-long commitments, and yes, a whole lot of uncertainty. Its not too difficult to imagine why the prospect of getting hitched can suddenly seem nightmarish, when it was all sunshine and flowers a few days ago.

Having said that, trust me, not all weddings are made of these gloomy stuff. I’ve seen really amazing couples who are totally into each other, and despite over 50 years of marriage, remain as sweet and loving as when they first started. There is normally much laughter at weddings, especially during our local ones, during the “jie xin niang” time, where everyone has a good laugh at their own expense. Furthermore, the tears shed during these event are mostly tears of joy and happiness, at seeing a loved one finally settling with his/her chosen one.

So how does one get over wedding jitters? Here are some tips to ensure that you don’t bolt out the front door;

Follow Your Gut Feeling
Deep down, despite all the uncertainty, there’s a portion of you that remains sane, and that knows the truth of the matter; this is the one. Listen to your gut feeling! If you can briefly forget about those butterflies, you’ll find that you’re actually more certain than you think!

Get Support from Loved Ones
Having a chat with that best friend of family member of yours may just be the key to prevent runaway brides. Your close one knows you best, and can reassure you of that decision you made way before the big day. Better yet, they can bar the door should you try to run out of it.

As suicidal as it may seem, talking to your prospective husband/wife can be a therapeutic thing. Let your loved one know how you feel, and if he/she is understanding, both of you can work through your irrational fears. Be tactful however, and don’t shed any negative opinions on the matter. Rather, discuss your concerns with your partner in an open and honest manner, and who knows, he/she may just give you the reassurance you need to pull through!

Whatever happens, do remember that the institution of marriage is a wonderful thing, and it’d be really a waste to let a few moments of doubt spoil a lifetime of happiness.

ps. To be on the safe side, better let your best man keep your car keys. 😉


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